Crying: weakness or therapy?

When it’s coming, you know. Beginning with a little bit of pressure in the nose, eyes start burning, lips involuntarily form themselves into a pursed position and then, of course, tears begin to flow. Somehow, crying has managed to sneak its way into the most important moments of our lives. From the second we entered the world, to the first day away from our parents, to the moment we felt the sting of harsh words, to the time we lost someone important in our lives – sobbing is an inescapable reality. Despite the commonality of crying, there is a sort of shame that follows these emotional outbursts. We nickname people who share these vulnerabilities externally as crybabies, weaklings and wusses. Yet, it is an undeniable truth that crying is a purposeful mechanism and suppressing such an innate response is bound to become damaging. 

Harvard Health states that psychological thought concurs that crying is a functional behavior that participates in the release of emotional pain and stress. Releasing difficult emotions through such a medium can be an optimal way to prevent repressive coping. Inhibiting the expression of negative emotions has been linked to cardiovascular disease, hypertension, a weaker immune system and mental health disorders. In contrast, crying has been shown to increase closeness, empathy and support among friends and family. Researchers have also established that crying releases endorphins and oxytocin, chemicals that can ease physical and emotional pain. 

Besides the puffy eyes and the runny noses, there aren’t any reasons to avoid crying. Of course, most people would cite embarrassment as one of the greatest deterrents for this behavior, but I would argue that the destigmatization of crying should start with the individual. Instead of looking down on ourselves for displays of emotion, we should applaud our courage to showcase our vulnerabilities and present them honestly. As the school year comes to a close and change is on the horizon, many are dealing with an array of emotions – sadness for leaving friends behind, happiness for graduating, anxiety over summer plans or the daunting unknown of the future. Adjusting to the fluctuating course of life is always a challenge, but maybe the burden could be lessened by being present and acknowledging the feelings experienced in the moment. So offer a shoulder for someone to cry on or just allow yourself to sob into your pillow if needed. Freedom and health can be found when we express ourselves to the truest extent. 

By Nicole Hardt