Ring, ring
The dumbest joke of Hollywood is calling
An old grizzled FBI agent is tasked with taking down a 20-something with no respect for the world. When the agent catches the kid, a deal is made outside of the agency. The kid will provide a bigger fish for the agent to fry in the courtroom. All the kid has to do is make a phone call. The agent pushes an old phone towards the kid. The kid pokes at the phone, looks up and says “I don’t think your phone works.”
Biggest cringe I can muster. This is one of the dumbest jokes Hollywood holds on to. It doesn’t even make sense. Granted, I’ve never used a rotary phone nor have I seen a landline since I was seven, but I’ve seen old movies. I watched “Mary Poppins,” “Adventures in Babysitting” and “Grease.” I think I have a pretty good idea of how to use one!
There is, however, a realistic joke — some might say a better joke — sitting right in front of filmmakers that requires the same amount of effort and sarcasm. The joke, my friend, is simple. The agent pushes a phone over to the kid. The kid looks at the phone, then to the agent, confused, and says, “I don’t know the number.”
Do you know how many numbers I have memorized? The answer is one. It’s my mom’s number which hasn’t changed since I was two years old. My dad changed his number roughly five years ago, and I knew even then I would never bother to learn it. If I am ever stranded and forced to use a stranger’s phone, I’m calling my mom. My mom knows everything, and I know how to get in touch with her. What else could I possibly need?
Therefore, I come to you with a request: stop laughing at that joke. It’s so dumb. It’s the laziest joke and I keep seeing it over and over again. It could so easily be better by changing just one sentence. Hollywood needs to get their comedy together and realize that just because a few Gen Zers don’t know how non-touchscreen phones work, doesn’t mean the majority of us don’t. Make jokes better by realizing what’s true. We can problem-solve a landline, but the only person I can call on it is my mama!
By: Lacey Stecker