Relationship Resolutions: Setting Healthy Dating Goals in the New Year

Though many New Year’s resolutions are quickly tossed by the wayside, setting healthy and reasonable goals for yourself can help you grow personally and in your relationships. Below are some tips on how to identify areas that could use work within a relationship and help you grow in a sustainable way.

Look at your relationships and evaluate areas that need work.

Sitting down and reflecting on your relationships and your personal role within them can be helpful when trying to set a goal. Identifying areas that have caused conflict in the past can help narrow the field. Do you have a temper or pick unnecessary fights?

Talk to your partner.

Talking to your partner directly can help you figure out areas in your relationship that need work. Most likely, they know you well. Going into the conversation with an open mind and actively listening to what they have to say is key. Ask your partner to keep their criticism constructive, as the goal is for you to grow, not to feel bad about the person that you currently are.

Set goals together.

While I highly recommend having your own personal goals for the New Year, setting some goals as a couple can be a great way to move forward in your relationship. Maybe you both want to save money and eat out less. Or maybe you want to work on communication. Whatever it is, having a joint goal can help you and your partner bond while moving you towards a healthier and happier relationship.

Give yourself grace.

Goals are set to help us better ourselves. However, this means that they also come with the very real possibility of occasional failure. Don’t be so hard on yourself when you backslide. Instead, move forward with your goal and accept that what you are doing is difficult. Success is not linear. It often involves ups and downs along the way. Allow yourself to accept your mistakes and move forward.

Relationships take work on both sides. Setting goals for improvement, communicating openly about your goals and observing how you work together as a team can move the relationship forward with a healthy and optimistic attitude. Though goals are often set at the beginning of the New Year, it is never too late to set a goal together, and it can only help you improve the foundation of your relationship.

Kaitlynn Toay is a senior

English major

from Edgeley, N.D.