Can anything go right?

New study finds another minor inconvenience might be the end of humanity

In a groundbreaking study released Monday, researchers confirmed what most people already suspected: humanity is currently operating at maximum capacity, and one more minor inconvenience will be its final straw.

The study, conducted by the National Institute of Being Tired, found that 98% of participants were “doing fine, technically,” but admitted they would emotionally collapse if asked to download one more app, reset one more password, or listen to one more person say, “Have you tried turning it off and back on again?”

“We’re not talking about major disasters,” said lead researcher Dr. Elaine Benes. “We’re talking about things like your phone charger only working at a specific angle, or the self-checkout machine loudly announcing, ‘UNEXPECTED ITEM IN THE BAGGING AREA’ when you are simply existing.”

Participants were subjected to a series of mild inconveniences, including lights that turn red when you’re already late, websites that won’t accept perfectly correct passwords, and emails marked “urgent” that absolutely were not. Within minutes, many subjects reported symptoms such as deep sighing, staring into space, and saying, “I just need one thing to go right today.”

One participant reportedly reached their breaking point after their sock slid down inside their shoe. “That was it,” they said. “I could have handled the traffic, the spilled coffee, and the email that started with ‘per my last message,’ but the sock was a personal attack.”

The study also found that people are especially vulnerable to inconvenience overload when hungry, tired, or already late. Researchers noted that being asked “Can you do this real quick?” during these moments increased the risk of emotional shutdown by 73%.

Experts warn that if current conditions persist, society may collapse entirely the next time a streaming service buffers at 99%.

“Humans are resilient,” Dr. Benes added. “But not that resilient.”

At press time, the study was temporarily delayed after the printer jammed, causing the research team to collectively sit down and stare at the wall in silence.

By Lily Morris