How Not to Ask Your Crush to Banquet

Ah, the inevitable banquet. Maybe you want to go, maybe you don’t. But one thing’s for sure: you aren’t going alone. Now is the time to seize the day and ask your crush to the institutionally sponsored group date night. There are many ways to get it right…and many more to get it wrong. I’m sure none of you would ever screw it up, but I’d like to highlight the top four ways to ensure your crush will always say no…just in case.

-        Have uc_match suggest you and your crush as a couple. Although this could be a good way to test the waters, it’s also super threatening if done incorrectly (see #2). If you don’t know your crush well, this is intimidating and puts up some red flags. Avoid this method of “subliminal messaging.”

-        Noticeably creep on your crush. Staring vacantly at your crush from afar is creepy. Please avoid it as much as you can. Your crush may not notice, but their subconscious will. They’ll see you and feel a sense of unease. Try your best to avoid staring, but if you can’t help it, take the initiative to talk to them. A conversation will help your crush get to know you.

-        Use peer pressure to get your crush to say yes. Just no. No, no, no, no, no. DO NOT DO THIS. First, it’s wildly disrespectful. Second, it’s cowardly. And third, it’s unfair. Your poor crush is stuck looking like a jerk if they say no to you. They may not be brave enough to tell you no in the moment, but they will not want to go with you if you do this. If they talk to their friends or mother about the situation, you will be dumped within the next few days.

-        Plan a promposal. Cue extreme cringing here. Argh! This is the most awkward and uncomfortable thing you could ever do to a person (unless they really like the attention). Please just ask them one-on-one. The elaborate schemes to get the S.O. make everyone uncomfortable. Just like with peer pressure, you may get an immediate yes, but you’ll likely be scrapped later.

Now that you know the worst things you can do, go out there and make good choices. Find a person you enjoy and ask them out respectfully (and hopefully one-on-one. NO PROMPOSALS PEOPLE!) Go to banquet, and have fun!

Lacey Stecker is a Sophomore

Communications Major from

Noblesville, Indiana